#Adulting is hard as we all know and since there are no clear cut guidelines that define what it is to be a successful full fledge adult here is a list of a few things that I believe it is important that every women be able to do for herself in no particular order but all equally important despite your income, where you live or relationship status.
- Know how to be okay, being by yourself…
Knowing that there is a difference between being alone and being lonely and knowing what that difference is- can be difficult and takes a good bit of self reflection but it is worth the effort and should not be discredited. Taking time to be along you realize that the world is bigger than you ever imagined and that your actual needs in life and the people you choose to fill yours with may be completely different. That is why I have always been a big believer in traveling solo. Without the opinions and desires of your crew/girls, discovering a new place alone, you get the opportunity to form your own experiences and discoveries about this new place and yourself as well! At the end of the day it comes down to this, if you can’t stand to be in your own company, why would anybody else?
2. Manage Your Money
Hey I get it, sometimes it isn’t about managing your money- it is about having money to manage! I remember my first couple of years out of college, probably during college as well, standing at check-out counters praying that my purchases would be able to clear my meager bank balance, “You will not return unto me void!” it was kind of funny at that time, not really, but you know what isn’t funny -at all? Reaching the end of your twenties, thirties, forties and still having to pray over your purchases! Successfully managing your money is to; know how much you bring in, prioritizing your expenditures and a healthy indulgence in self-denial. Let us start really living within our means and get to a place where you can start saving money and then getting your savings to start working to make you more money! Now that is sexy…
3. Feed Your Yourself
No one expects you to cook at a level to be a contestant for Top Chef but you also shouldn’t be a shoe in for America’s Worst Cook either. Having a few simple meals under your culinary belt will make a world of difference in your confidence and ability to function in life plus bonus points if these meals you can cook are well balanced and nutritional (sorry, box mac’ n cheese but this isn’t the place for you…) Listen, you don’t have to love cooking but you should be able to! Cooking is a life skill for a reason and you never know you might discover a new passion while learning!
4. Know Your Mind….
And know how to speak your truth (Let the church say AMEN!) This is a principle that affects every aspect of your life from your career, friendships to your relationship with family and romantic entanglements because knowing your mind is really knowing yourself, your desires, your limits, your worth and your needs. Healthy relationships can not be created or maintained if you have no sense of self. Not knowing where you stand is more than a being people pleaser we are talking about being a doormat and if you are willing to lay down your own opinions and feelings or you don’t even know what they might be– people will just walk right over you.
5. Care for Your Sister..
We are our sisters keepers and nothing exemplifies this more than one woman’s ability to uplift or support her fellow woman. There are enough forces in this world that want nothing more than to tear us down, so why should we do it to one another? In realizing that we are the standard by which the world operates we as women can change generations to come; with a smile, a kind word, an outstretched hand and a warm embrace. A woman who knows her own worth, her value and how to handle her business has no need to cut down others by shaming them for their choices.
Until Next Time!